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On Becoming Ourselves...

Before I began my Real Estate Career... I taught seventh and eighth grade in the Cleveland Catholic Schools. One of the programs stressed in our school was called "Becoming A Person." The main tenet of this program was pretty much as the title stated... we... each of us... are all in the process of "Becoming A Person."

Life is not a "state of being"... life is a process. Life is not a "destination"... it is a "direction..." or a "journey."

There are basic laws in physics that state that an object that is in motion tends to stay in motion unless acted upon by an "outside force." The other side of that is that an object that is "at rest" tends to stay at rest... unless acted upon by an "outside force."

The above "objects" are just that... objects. The forces that are either able to change the direction of those objects, or put them in motion when originally at rest... those forces must come from "outside" that object.

~                ~                ~                ~                ~

We are in luck. We really are ! We... have The Edge. And that "edge"... is "ourselves."

When we combine the sense of "Becoming A Person" with the above laws of physics, we do not have to depend on an "Outside Force" to either change our direction, or to move ourselves from standing totally still... to being in motion.

We... are that force. As hard as it might be to believe this at first... We... are in control.

Whatever it Is that We are thinking... those same thoughts are a perfect reflection of whatever it is that We are becoming.

And since what We are thinking determines what We are feeling... We can also control our feelings.

We have an "Edge." And that "edge"... is "Us."

We have the power to become who We choose to be. Whatever We focus on... We will become.

Whenever We choose to think what We think, and whenever We choose to feel what We feel... whether We know it or not... We are... all by ourselves... choosing who it is that We are becoming.

What are you choosing to think ? What are you choosing to feel ?

Those choices... are YOUR choices.

The thoughts and the feelings that you focus on... are what determines Who and What You Are Becoming.

What Are You Choosing to Think ? What Are You Choosing to Feel ? Who Are You Choosing to Become ?

And can you find... within yourself... the power to Make That Choice ?

Comment balloon 33 commentsKaren Anne Stone • March 13 2008 05:56PM

Comments

Karen,
you are making me think today.  I choose to be positive in outlook believing that I can make a difference.  I choose to believe in my fellow man and that in general they will make good decisions for themselves, their families, their community.  AJ
Posted by Alan 'AJ' Nisen California Contra Costa Mortgage Officer (A Large Bank in America) almost 11 years ago
Karen, this is so true. I went out to dinner with friends over the weekend. Everyone at the table is older than I, and so we had good laughs about bi-focals, tri-focals, aches & pains, and things going downhill after 40. (I wasn't doing the talking, just the listening and laughing). Well, wouldn't you know it - I had the worse muscle cramp ever! on Sunday, and my leg was sore until Wednesday night.
Posted by Jackie - computer-training-atlanta.com, Learn to leverage technology to get more done. (770.498.7333) almost 11 years ago
Karen Anne, this is an incredible post on so many levels. The implications from the global view to the personal view are enormous. You must have been a wonderful teacher, wait you still are. We are our thoughts as our thoughts are the basis of our actions which are the outward expression of who we are! This is very refreshing, thanks!
Posted by Rich Dansereau (Positive Real Estate Professionals) almost 11 years ago
Karen, Very nice post!  Life is a journey... We musn't take life too seriously though, because no one has ever gotten out of it alive!  congratulations, again on 100,000 points!
Posted by Don Wixom, "Looking out for your next move..."tm (RE/MAX Advantage Nampa, ID) almost 11 years ago

Karen, Thank you for sharing.  It felt like a tongue twister.  Very moving.  We were definitely on the same wave length today.  Take care,

Posted by Christina ONeal, Realtor - Ripon California (At Home Real Estate Group) almost 11 years ago
Karen - I always have said that life is a road - how you travel it will set the rewards of the day - some parts of the road need to be taken slower than other parts - enjoy the ride and make the most of your journey to your destination - thanks for sharing
Posted by Thesa Chambers, Principal Broker - Licensed in Oregon (Fred Real Estate Group) almost 11 years ago

Jeez Karen Anne - I can't think this much today, I'm still getting over a cold. 

Here is one thing I know for sure, though.  Rhiannon, my 10 year old, has had fits (tantrums) since 1.5 years of age.  BIG ones.  She's not a joke.  After reading a book called How to Raise Your Sensitive Child I started to change some things.  One of the main things I changed was our words.  I started naming her emotions as best I could (thinking that's part of the blow up, she just has these feelings & doesn't know what they're about).  The main thing though is the word "CHOOSE".  Rather than trying, we started choosing.  Rather than things just happening or "I can't help it", we used the word choose.  What an amazing difference.  And that's just one little word. 

So I will  have to re-read this post & think about it more when I am off the Dayquil.  Thank you!

www.stagingwebsites.com

Posted by Chris Fisher (Your Virtual Assistant) over 10 years ago

Karen Ann, I choose CHOCOLATE. I admit it. I hope this doesn't make me a big blob of chocolate. Since it is Sat nite & I'm here blogging, I might be a big blogging blob of chocolate.

Seriously, I agree with your post. We are what we choose.

Scary, isn't it?

Posted by Bonnie & Terry Westbrook, Grand Rapids MI Real Estate (Westbrook Realty) over 10 years ago

...and I choose to shun people who choose to be consistently negative.  I can feel it pulling me down.

In other news, I taught too.  For 30+ years!

And Bonnie's lying.  She's a small blogging blob of chocolate.

Posted by Karen Webster...Grand Rapids, MI Realtor (5 Star Real Estate, Grand Rapids MI) over 10 years ago
Karen Anne......this is so true.  good article.  Happy Easter.
Posted by Pam Winterbauer, "Providing Blue Ribbon Service" (Pam Winterbauer Real Estate) over 10 years ago
Karen,  The most important aspect in your blog is that the end product is determined by the choices you make.  As human beings it is the edge we have over the rest of living creatures who are products of their ingrained instincts.  Karen
Posted by Karen Kruschka, - "My Experience Isn't Expensive - It's PRICELESS" (RE/MAX Executives) over 10 years ago
AJ:  Being positive, and believing in your fellow humans is a great attitude to have.  What do we do, though, when that doesn't work ?
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Jackie:  Well, girlfriend... LOL... that should teach you !  You... just sitting there... watching and listening to all of those "older" people complain about falling apart.  Sounds like you better order your walker, and perhaps one of those scooters they sell on late night television.  Take care...
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Rich:  Once again, you are being very kind.  Thank you.  You phrased that very well... our thoughts are the basis of our actions, and our actions are the outward expression of who we are.  You basically said in about twenty words what I dragged out to about 300.  Way to go.  Keep up the good work... LOL.

Seriously, Rich.  I really appreciate all your great comments.  Thanks so much for your loyalty.

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Don:  Oh, I totally agree that we should not take either life, or ourselves too seriously.  I was just feeling scholarly, I guess, when I wrote this.  I think I ended up with a brain-cramp after this post... I probably need to re-write it and smush-out some of the convolutions.  Thanks for your kind words.
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Hi Christina:  Yes, in re-reading this post, I guess it did come out pretty-much a tongue-twister.  It wasn't a very easy read, I guess.  Perhaps I did get carried away... and yes, I think my head hurt for about three hours after I wrote this.  Ouch.  But, in spite of that... thanks for your kind words.
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Thesa:  Yes, life is a road... and we are on a journey.  As you mentioned, some parts of it should be taken more slowly than others.  In looking back... I can think of several times I should have pretty much camped-out at places that I ended up rushing through.  But... although looking back can bring some bits of wisdom, it can also drive you crazy if you let it.  I know from experience... LOL.
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Chris:  You said that you "couldn't think this much today..." I am guessing because I wrote it in such a convoluted way.  You couldn't think much, and I waayy over-thought as I was writing it.  My head still hurts from it... LOL.  But, my thought was good, and my heart was in the right place.  Perhaps it was a take on that late night commercial about RLS... restless leg syndrome.  I must have had RBS... restless brain syndrome.

Chris, what a great story about your daughter.  Sheer Genius !  With you sharing many of your stories about Rhiannon, I see more and more examples of what a great Mom you are.  You are fabulous !

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Bonnie:  Yes, we are what we choose, and some of us are also what we eat.  So, in your case, just make sure your thermostat says on the cool side.  We don't want you to melt, dearrie !  LOL.  And yes, having control over ourselves... which means "no more excuses"... is very scary.  I'm not sure I can work very well under those conditions.
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Karen W:  Of course, negative people can pull us down.  Luckily, although it can be very difficult, and sometimes painful to do, staying away from negative people is not easy at times.

Wow... you taught for thirty years, and I only taught for nine.  And, poor me, I think I'm crazy.  But I am sure you were... and still are... just a wonderful teacher.  I bet there are some of your more grateful former students who have erected statues of you in their front yards, and plant pretty flowers all around you.  I applaud and admire you for all of your years helping and teaching our youngsters.  Hooray for You !

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Hi Pam:  Thanks for your kind comment, but as I said in many of the above comments, I think I was in an overly-scholarly mode when I wrote this.  My thought, and my intention was great, but even my head hurts when I re-read it.  Was it in Animal Farm when the animals kept saying... "I will try harder ?"  Perhaps the next time... I won't try quite as hard.  Take care... and Happy Easter to the three of you.... you, Murphy Brown, and your sweetie-pie !

Also... thanks for commenting on this.  Somehow I let my commenting on the comments slip by me, and seeing your comments has spurred me onward.  Take care...

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Karen:  Your comment is oh, so true.  Yes, the end product is determined by the choices we make. 

And yes, to quote you, "it is also true that as human beings it is the edge we have over the rest of living creatures who are products of their ingrained instincts." 

There are times, though, when the ingrained insctincts that we, too, were born with, might sometimes be the better course of action to take.  I think what I am trying to say here... is that sometimes we "know" more and better than we think we do.  Thanks so much for your comment.  Take care...

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Karen Anne, I'll give you a million dollars for each of my former students who were so appreciative they made a statue of me for their yard. :)
Posted by Karen Webster...Grand Rapids, MI Realtor (5 Star Real Estate, Grand Rapids MI) over 10 years ago
Karen W:  That is so generous of you.  If you could, I would like the money in small, un-marked, non-consecutive bills, please.  Thank you so much.
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

You're so sweet Karen Anne, thank you.  I understood what you were saying, I just couldn't think about it!  I have been way overworked lately and my brain is on overload.  Rhiannon has some of those Who Is Who Was books... she called me in the room when she was reading Who Was Leonardo Da Vinci & told me it was making her brain think too much & she had to put it down.  I was on overload like that.  : )

Posted by Chris Fisher (Your Virtual Assistant) over 10 years ago

Karen Anne:

The motivation I needed...thank you!!!  I preach this type of stuff to the new agents in the office, but I am finding I need to be reminded too. 

Posted by Chris Ann Cleland, Associate Broker, Bristow, VA (Long and Foster REALTORS®, Gainesville, VA) over 10 years ago
Hi Everyone:  I have re-written this post "On Becoming Ourselves."  Well... I have "modified" it.  It was a little too convoluted for even me to understand.  LOL.  If you wish, I invite you to take another look.  I hope it works better this time... thanks so much for your patience.   Karen Anne
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Karen,

I love it! If we could get the world to understand....My daughters are both in this business with me. This has been our motto! Great work

Posted by Becky Respess, ABR, CRB, CRS (Broker/Associate Century 21 Judge Fite Co) over 10 years ago
Becky:  I think that's got to be a pretty long long-shot.  And... how incredibly lucky you are to be working with your two daughters.  I have tried to get my daughter into real estate, and she won't even think about it.  She wants regular paychecks.  Sissy !  LOL.
Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago
Great post! I really enjoyed it because on one of my biggest pet peeves are those who blame others for where they are in life, or for the things that happen to them. Taking responsibility for your life and actions is most important in good times and bad. Sometimes the bad times wouldn't even be that bad if people handled them properly to begin with. Life is full of ingredients, and all we have to is stay positive, choose wisely and utilize them, and then enjoy the great recipe of success!
Posted by Nancy Kent, RE/MAX Hill & Valley, Western Mass (RE/MAX Hill & Valley) over 10 years ago

Hi Nancy:  Even to the degree that we always have choices... there are often times in our lives when the choice may be between two alternatives... neither of which is all that much to write home to Mother about !  We do not control the world, but we do have choices.  Sometimes we don't like the choices we have... but we can control what we do with those choices. 

I think one of the most importance choices we can control... is our attitude both when having to make the choice, and also our attitude when having to face the consequences of that choice.  Sure, as you said, life is full of "ingredients."  We may not be able to choose some of the ingredients that end up in our shopping carts... but we surely can choose what to do with them once we get them home and start unpacking them. 

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 10 years ago

Sure Karen, nobody has control of everything that happens to them - that was not my point. That is part of life - things happen. They can however take the efforts to handle the situations as best as possible or at least learn from them. We may even become stronger from having endured it. 

At some point, we all have been dealt a deck of cards that have left us spinning, and maybe even questioning ~ WHY? We just need to be careful not to let these things magnify into something larger, and keep us down.

Posted by Nancy Kent, RE/MAX Hill & Valley, Western Mass (RE/MAX Hill & Valley) over 10 years ago
I'm choosing to be grateful for everything I have to focus on that. I also choose to speak in a positive way about the things that are happening in my world. To focus on others needs and wants instead of mine. I choose to thank God for all that is around me at this very moment. To be a kind, compassionate and loving person. That is what I was taught as I child. Funny how we forget...isn't it.
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