Fort Worth Real Estate Online

Karen Anne - What a wonderful tribute to your dad.  I lost mine several years ago and think about him an awful lot... especially as I get older and think of the things he taught me.. things I sometimes resisted at the time.  :)  This is a wonderful birthday card.  I'm sure he's missing you as much as you miss him.  God Bless, Karen Anne!

Hi, Karen Ann,

This is just wonderful.  You've done such a good thing here writing this birthday card to your Dad.  Did I tell you that I'm facilitating a GriefShare class at my church?  It's a great program for people who have lost a loved one/family member/friend to death.  In the class they suggest that those who are grieving should write a letter to the person who died or write to their friends sharing their feelings.  This is exactly what they recommend.  Do you mind if I share this with my class members?  It will be so helpful to them!

Karen-Anne, how sweet to remember your dad this way. I always think of my dad especially on his birthday, and wish he was here.

Karen Anne, that was a very lovely remembrance of your father on his birthday.  I'm fortunate to still have both my parent and I shudder to think of all the emotions involved with the losing of one's Mom or Dad.

Karen Anne, This is a beautiful tribute I can surely relate to. My Dad would be turning 88 this year. He died way too early, back in 1986. He had just retired the year before and he and Mom were just getting to do some traveling and other things they had looked forward to doing over the years. I still miss him but mostly I feel happy when I think of him and what an amazing Dad he was. Thanks for sharing this.

Karen:

Your post made me smile. Sounds like your dad was a great man. I lost my dad very young. I was only 33 and he was 57. Happy Birthday memories for your dad and all he meant to you.

Nineteen years!  You never forget those special days, do you?  This is a lovely post, and I'm sure he's smiling down from heaven.

Karen Anne - what a nice post about your dad.  I'm sorry for your loss... it just never gets easy, does it?  My grandma (80) lost her mother when she was 24 and still misses her.  I'm sending your dad a happy birthday thought right now.

Hi Kathy:  I am sure you resisted the things you now realize he taught you... just like I did.  I know that is kind of natural to do that.  I'm sorry that you, too, have lost your Dad.  Thanks for your kind thoughts.  Take care...

Hi Jan:  I really didn't "plan" on writing it.  I was just sitting here at the keyboard last night, and the thought just popped into my head.  And yes, I think it is a good thing.  I am very sure that your grief/share class is proving extremely beneficial to all those attending.

I think writing a letter is a great idea, and you are surely welcome to share my letter with those in your class.  It is just another way of extending and passing on what I call "caring behaviours."  Take care... be well.

Hi Missy:  I think of my Mom much more often that I do my Dad, but last night... there he was.  And, of course, on his birthday... I am sure he is very "with you" when you think of him.  Take care... be well...

Hi Brian:  Yes, you are very fortunate to still have both your parents with you.  Once they are gone... for many there is a special kind of emptiness there.  Love them while you have them, Brian.  Take care...

Hi Vicki:  Our fathers were pretty much the same age.  They were from a very different time... very different indeed.  How incredible and how crazy it must have been for them to be ten or eleven during the 1929 Depression, and to be young men when World War II began.

My Dad died not long after retiring, although in many ways he never felt like he fully "retired."  Take care, Vicki... thanks for sharing.  And... you are very welcome.  Thank you for your kind comments.

Hi Alan:  In many ways there were not all that many "wonderful" memories of him.  When he returned from Italy and World War II... I was only three years old.  He was a very different person from the man who left my Mom to go overseas and fignt in the war.  I alway wonder how different he might have been had he not gone through he horrible trauma he faced.  Thanks for sharing, Alan.  Take care... be well...

Hi Margaret:  His birthdays were a lot more pleasant and special for all of his when he was in his later years.  Luckily, those "better years" are the ones I most remember.  I remember when visiting him saying... "Hi Pop!"  His answer was always the same... "I'll 'pop' ya !"  It was sort of a "game."  We kids always called him Pop.

Hi Chris:  I very much understand your grandmother's grief.  It has been 56 years for her since her mother's passing, but I imagine that some days, her mother's passing may seem like it was just recently.  Knowing my dad, I would not be surprised that if he were to receive your happy birthday thought... he just might come back and thank you personally.  So... keep an eye out for him... LOL.

Thank you so much for sharing these wonderful memories of your dad. It is ironic that the memories are fading as time makes them more distant because the feelings and emotions don't fade at all. With this blog, these particular memories will live forever in cyberspace. You honor your father with this.

Karen Anne, This is a lovely Birthday Card for your Dad. I am thankful to still have my Dad but we don't know for how much longer. I am looking forward to his 79th birthday in March.

Hi Rich:  Actually, I think everything and everyone is composed of "energy" and I do believe that the memory of someone can live on through speaking about them, or even speaking "to" them after they are gone.  I think it also continues when they are written about... because part of them, and even part of myself continues once those words are written and/or sent.  Thanks so much for your kind words, Rich.  Take care...

Hi Judy:  It is an old saying, but it becomes more true every time it is said.  We never know how much someone means to us until they are gone.  I am sure you are going to have a great birthday celebration with your Dod in March.  Give him a hug for me.  Judy, thanks for your kind words... take care... stay warm...

Karen Anne, What a wonderful tribute to you dad.  I'm glad I got to read it.  That's what makes AR such a great community.

My mother died a little over 12 years ago.  She was also way too young.  For those left behind its hard to understand why they were taken away from us so early.  For my mother, it was her time.  She said as much to me two days prior to passing. She was tired, her illness had taken over her life - -which to her, was not a life.  Two days later she was gone.  It was as if she was preparing me.  I remember saying to one old friend of hers that it was sudden, but not unexpected given the severity of her illness.  I still miss her - even after all this time. 

Hi Kay:  I am glad you were able to read it too, Kay.  And thanks for your kind words.  Yes, this is one of the things that make AR such a great community.  It is too bad that there are so many others on Active Rain who would call my post about my Dad... "off topic."  I think "real estate" is all about relationships, and getting to know each other is such a great part of that.  Thanks again, and take care...

Hi Ruthmarie:  I am so sorry for your loss.  It sounds like your mother really knew she was going to leave you soon.  There is so much about life that we don't know, and yes, so much of it is very hard to fathom.  I can very much understand her comment about "being tired..." especially if her illness had taken over her life.  I also agree that she was probably preparing you.  I would guess that... depending on the relationship between parent and child... missing her would last the rest of your life.  That sounds normal to me.  Take care, Ruthmarie... my thoughts are with you.

what a great post - dad's they are great - I did not met mine until I was 41 or so - and the few memories we have made I know will fade some day too - oh how I wish I had more time with him

Karen Anne - I don't have any idea how I missed this one.  Thanks for telling me about it.  Your father sounds like quite a character, and a very special man.  I think he and my grandfather would have gotten along quite well.  Take care and have a great week, my friend.  I am going to feature this post in Family Ties.

Karen -

My Dad passed away in 1996.  When he was alive, and when I was younger, we often argued like crazy.

Nowadays, I just miss him!

How cool it would have been to show him all I have achieved, with Sue and our Team, since he passed away!

Let's raise a glass to the "Old Man!"

DEAN & DEAN'S TEAM CHICAGO

Hi Thesa:  Your comment just amplifies how important it is to recognize that our loved ones will not be with us as long as we would hope, and that we need to love them and show them we do... while they are here.  Thanks for your kind words... take care...

Hi Jason:  I really don't know how you keep up with things as well as you do.  You are such a prolific writer... and most of your posts get a zillion comments.  Thanks so much for the Family Ties feature.  Take care...

Hi Dean:  Yes, arguing between Dad and son is so often an issue.  My Dad and I had a much better relationship during his later years.  Perhaps he was "mellowing."  Dean, I am sure that somehow he has seen all you have achieved.  Take care...

Karen I know how hard it is to lose a parent. I loss both of mne at 13 years old. No one will ever fill the vacuum.

I remember seeing a Shirley Temple movie, in the film her grandmother was dying and Shirley cried and begged her not to die. Her tears were to no avail and her grandmother closed her eyes in death. Shirley cried herself to sleep. Later that night she felt someone stroking her hair. It was her grandmother. She was startled. She said, "Grams, I thought you died?" Her grandmother responded, "I will never die as long as you never forget me." 

Long live your Dad. May his memories sustain you throughout the drifting years.

Warmest regards,

This brought me to tears Karen.  We we lose someone close to us, it is always hard.  Isn't it wonderful that we still have the memories?   I wish we could remember them forever. I keep meaning to start a journal and I haven't done it.  Thank god I now have my blog to capture many moments. I guess I need to start a personal one to track the wonderful memories with my children that I don't share here.  A big hug to you today Karen and happy birthday to your dad.

HI Dionne:  What an incredibly sweet story you tell about Shirley Temple.  Her Gram's words "I will never die as long as you never forget me" are so caring, and so real.  In some cosmic way we have the power to keep our loved ones who have passed away with us... as long as we are able to remember them.  Thank you Dionne for your very kind words... take care...

Hi Ginger:  I think journalling is a really great thing to do.  I kept a journal for many, many years.  Journalling can be very therapeutic, and can also provide a sort of benchmark when looking back at what I have written and trying to compare it to where I am today.  It at times has been a great help to me by showing me, or helping me to know where I was... or where I emotionally "came from" years ago.  Ginger, I understand the tears. 

Besides the journal I have seven boxes in the garage labelled "Memory Boxes."  They contain all kinds of things that connect me to my daughter's early childhood, my own childhood, my high school sweetheart, my relationship with my parents, and the different crises I somehow lived through.  I even have some letters that my mom wrote to me after I moved from Ohio to Texas in 1982.  I have not opened those boxes in awhile... ghost's... you know.  Ginger, thanks for your kind words.  Take care...

Karen - I felt your love and passion for your Dad and as if he were right here with me as I read your birthday wish. I am sure your Dad is definitely smiling and still telling stories over and over again! I feel your pain and love as I too wish I could be with my Mom in the same way. A tender moment before I end my day, it's so nice to catch up with you on such a pleasant tribute to your Dad. Happy Birthday, Karen's Dad...Happy Birthday.

Karen Anne...Here's wishing a

Belated Happy Birthday to Karen Anne's Dad!

Like many others, I too can relate to your feelings regarding your dad.  My dad was only 72 (I'm almost 71) which was way too young to die.  We were sure we would have him much, much longer as both of his parents lived into their late 80's.  What a shock when he died in his sleep of cardiac arrest.

We are very fortunate to have had a dad that we miss so much and always will.

Take care,

Kathleen

Hi Candace:  Knowing my Dad, I am sure he would have enjoyed it if he actually were there with you... LOL.  How sweet you are with your kind and caring comments.  My Mom is gone, too, and I miss her very much.  It is usually Mom who is on my mind, but Tuesday night/Wednesday morning was my Dad's birthday, and my thoughts were with him.  Thanks for sharing my Dad's birthday with us.  Take care... hope all is well with you.

Hi Kathleen:  My Dad's mother lived until she was 97, but my Dad simply didn't take very good care of himself.  He grew up in the 1930's... and smoking was normal... everyone had that horrible habit, and nobody had a clue what it did to your lungs.  They should have, but they didn't.  And yes, I agree... having had a dad that we actually miss... .  Take care... hugs to you.

Karen Anne - I am going to include this one in the weekly wrapup post today for Family Ties.

Karen,

Beautiful tribute to your dad...mine died at age 57...but you know what...our dads will ALWAYS be our dads!!! Treasure the memories!!! Thanks,   Fran

P.S. And besides, our dads live on, in and through us!

Karen Anne, thank you for sharing this.

My grandfather was Jewish, and at his funeral the rabbi tore a part of my grandmother's shawl. The tradition is a symbol of how when someone we love passes away, we will never be the same again. They are torn from us.

To remember in love sometimes lets you feel that pain again, but the love is so great that it's worth it.

Hi Jason:  Thank you so much.  That might even allow my Dad to meet some new friends.  Thanks again, Jason.

Hi Fran:  Your dad passed away even earlier than my dad did.  I am sorry for your loss.  The only thing better than treasuring our memories would be for those whose Dads are still with them... to treasure them while there are still alive.  Thanks for your kind words.

Hi Joey:  What a beautiful custom.  The rabbi's recognition of your grandfather's passing acknowledges the loss felt by all those left behind.  And yes, they certainly are torn from us.  Your comment about remembering someone with love and that doing so lets you feel that pain again... sometimes that pain is so great our subconscious mind does things that are aimed at coping with that pain.  Sometimes it is almost too much.  Joey, thanks for your comments, and for sharing that wonderful custom.  Take care...

Hi Karen Anne, That is a wonderful tribute to your dad.  I'm sure you miss him very much.  I still have both my parents and I am so thankful that they are still with me and my children.  My mom will be 80 this March and my dad will be 90 in September.

Hi Roberta:  Wow... that is really something, Roberta.  You are truly blessed.  My daughter Robin, who is 35, has some memories of my father... her grandfather.  We moved to Fort Worth from Cleveland in 1982... and my dad passed away in 1988.  Robin saw him perhaps once or twice after we moved, and what she remembers of him... she remembers fondly.  It would have been so great for both of them to have been able to get to know each other better.  My Dad would have been 88 on January 23.  Thanks for your kind words... take care... and, hug your parents often.

Karen Anne, what a nice thought to write a birthday card to your father.  Perhaps he'll know, and smile.

Karen Anne-Thank you for sharing your Dad with us. Continue to tell his stories because I am sure he loves hearing you tell them.  I have no doubt you were a huge blessing in his life.  Having grown up without a dad I cry at not having those memories to share.  I'm the one crying at the weddings while watching the father and daugher dance. Dads are such an important part of our lives and when you have a good one you should honor him, and you just did. Thank you! 

Karen Anne, My dad is 89 and he lives with me.  Unfortunately he has Lewy Bodies dementia.  It is sad to lose your dad at 70, but perhaps it was a kindness as well.  You have such wonderful memories to treasure.  Life gets much harder as people lose their health and get older.  My mom is 95 and in a nursing home.  We still have good moments, but life is not easy and my memories of them will be heavily weighted with the later years.

Hi Brian:  That was exactly my thought, too.  I think he has seen it, and I really think it made him smile.  Honestly, as I think of it, I can actually see him smiling.  Thanks for your kind thoughts.  Take care...

Hi Sally:  I am glad to share my Dad with you.  And yes, I tell his stories.  Everytime I tell one of those stories, he seems closer to me.  I did what I could as he got older, and I felt very guilty when I moved from Cleveland to Fort Worth... even though he still had my two brothers and my sister there with him.  Sally... I'm sad you grew up without a dad, and I totally understand your sadness in not having the memories others have.  Crying at weddings while watching the fathers and daughters dancing... just thinking about you being there makes me sad, too.  Huggs to you.  I will gladly share my Dad with you anytime you wish.   Sally... take care...

Hi Gail:  It is such a mixed blessing having your dad living with you.  I can feel the stress in your voice as I read your thoughts about him losing his health as he gets older.  It must be so hard.  And with your Mom so old... wow.  I am amazed at your strength.  You mentioned your memories of them being heavily weighted with the later years.  I am sure.  I might suggest... since you have such a talent for writng... to write a sort-of "parental journal" of all your earlier memories of both your Mom and your Dad.  Write them before they all become too much of a blur for you to pull back out of the past.  I have kept a journal... on and off... and I'm so glad I have.  Gail... take care... and thanks for sharing.

What a great tribute to your dad, I still give my sister a birthday flower every year on her birthday even though I never had a chance to meet her.

Hi Todd:  That is so sweet of you.  How did it happen that you never had a chance to meet her.  If it is too private, that is ok.  But what an incredibly sweet thing for you to do.  What a great brother.  Todd, thanks for your kind thoughts.  Take care...

Hi Karen Anne,
What a nice post remembering your Dad.  Daughters and Dads have a special bond.

Hi Cynthia:  Yes, the bond between Dads and Daughters can be very special.  I only wish he were still here so we could fuss at each other over whether he gets to watch Tiger Woods play golf on TV, or if I get to watch Maria Sharapova play tennis at the Australian Open.  <grin>

Karen - I'm sorry I missed this post!  I truly understand your thoughts.  I lost my dad on Mother's Day of 1990.  I was numb for a week.  Although it was not unexpected, it was much to quick.  I have a portrait of my mom and dad on the wall and I speak with them daily.  Some would think that's odd - to me it's my life.

Happy Birthday to your dad!  I'm sure he was a special man. 

Hi Carol:  Well, I guess you and I will just be "odd" together.  I talk to both my Mom and my Dad before I go to sleep each night... kind of reviewing the day's happenings, telling them I love them and miss them... and then it's off to sleep.  Yes, some say that is odd, but hey, my Mom used to tell me that "odd" is just another word for special.  Take care...

Karen Anne, That was a great suggestion and I have already been doing something of the sort.  For their 59th wedding anniversary in October I scanned in old photos of my parents as young single adults, when they met and started dating, and all the way through their marriage.  I ended up with a 50 page spiral-bound book and gave a copy to each of them.  For my mom's 95th birthday, I did a "This Is Your Life" PowerPoint slide show and paid people to come to the "party" (had to pay people as no one will willingly go to a party at a nursing home, LOL).  She had a great time and felt she was queen for a day.  In between the illnesses, hospitalizations, and stress of caregiving, we still have some good moments, but it's not easy.

In the past few years I have lost first my father at age 94 and then my mother at 90. Long lives but it was still hard to have them gone and  it still is at times.

Hi Karen, My Dad died a long time ago at 70 too,... I thought of doing a Happy Birthday Dad post for him, but I just was too darn sad to get to it.  Your Dad sounds like he was a lot of fun to e around!

Ginger 

Karen Anne- having recently lost my father and being a daddy's girl!  this post made me smile and cry at the same time! 

Hi Gail:  It sounds like you were way ahead of me on my suggestion.  Memories often fade as we get older, and the 50 page book you put together for your parents was truly a labor of love that only a loving daughter could give.  I am so glad you found a way to have people come to her party.  She had to be feeling like Queen For A Day !  (Do you remember that program ?) 

Gail, I am sure it is not easy... and who takes care of the care-givers ?  But at least you will know in your heart that you did all you could do to make their latter days as pleasant as could be... and that they indeed felt cared for.  What a sweet daughter you are.  Take care... and thanks for sharing...

Hi Kathleen:  It is so hard to lose your parents.  They lived to such a "ripe" old age that I might guess that at times it may have seemed they might be with you forever.  Sure it still hurts... and it will.  But when it does, somehow they are still there with you.  Take care...

Hi Ginger:  Just re-do my post, and change whatever things you need to... to make it your own.  It'll just be our little secret.  Actually Ginger... when you were "thinking" of doing that post for your Dad... he was actually reading it while it was in your mind... and he loves you for the thought.  Take care...

Hi Marci:  Smiling and crying at the same time are just two different ways of showing how much you cared for your father.  I am sure he is with you... and would wipe your tears if he could.  Take care... huggs to you...

Beautiful post, Karen Anne. I remember when my dad passed away, I couldn't sleep at all that night. I got up out of bed and typed out a lot of my thoughts about him. It helped me to deal with it. At the wake I realized that my younger brother had done exactly the same thing. My dad was 89 when he passed away. this month, he would have been 94. I'll be thinking of your post on his birthday.

i luv your work,it is luvly